Sunday, December 20, 2009

2009 NFL Pickery - Week #15

Last Week:

Aaron: 12-4
Tom: 10-6
Joe: 10-6

Season to Date:

Tom: 139-69
Joe: 138-70
Aaron: 134-74

Indianapolis at Jacksonville (Thurs.)

Aaron: I daresay the Colts might be the blandest juggernaut since the six year championship reign of former pro wrestler Bob Backlund in the late '70s/early '80s. Hey, the embarassment is worth it for the five of you who get the reference. Pick: Indianapolis

Joe: As a Yankee fan, I've grown to appreciate the charms of a bland juggernaut. Plus I do enjoy seeing so many people continue to eat crow on Peyton Manning. Pick: Indianapolis

Dallas at New Orleans (Sat.)

Aaron: Did every team in the NFC east simply secede from their own secondaries? Thankfully for the Cowboys, the Saints don't have much of a passing game. Wait. Oh, sh*t, Dallas. Pick: New Orleans

Joe: You would think, given the Saints' tendency to play down to every team not based in New England these last several weeks, Dallas would be a prime candidate to upset them. The problem is, New Orleans, like SkyNet, becomes most dangerous when self-aware. I'm saying, this is either where the Saints take their loss, or it's Judgment Day for Wade Phillips. Pick: New Orleans

Arizona at Detroit

Aaron: Should we be sadder that these might be the final three games of Daunte Culpepper's Lions career or that he'll be competing for a starting job in Oakland in 2010? Pick: Arizona

Joe: I, for one, have more faith in Bruce Gradkowski's healing abilities. Pick: Arizona

Cleveland at Kansas City

Aaron: Perhaps if the Browns borrowed COBRA's "Weather Dominator" (last seen in the seminal 1984 animated miniseries G.I. Joe: The Revenge of COBRA) and played their games in blizzards every week... Pick: Cleveland

Joe: Can't top that analysis. Won't try. Pick: Kansas City

San Francisco at Philadelphia

Aaron: Sweet dreams, flickering San Francisco 49er playoff hopes. Here, let me tuck you in. Pick: Philadelphia

Joe: So the Eagles have everybody buying into them, on some "unstoppable offense" theory? ...Huh. All right. Pick: Philadelphia

Chicago at Baltimore

Aaron: Chicago fans won't have the Cubs' Milton Bradley to kick around anymore, as the angry Black OF was sent packing this week. Jay Cutler has petulantly agreed to accept Bradley's "kick around" bookings. Pick: Baltimore

Joe: Aw. Remember when Ray Lewis and the Ravens' D was fearsome enough that we could count on them to pound on snot-nosed QBs? Pick: Baltimore

New England at Buffalo

Aaron: The Bills might have a shot in these lousy weather conditions. Wait, it's going to be sunny in Buffalo on Sunday? In the high 20s, you say? Shot rescinded. Pick: New England

Joe: Hey, the fact that I'm moved on from hoping the Bills lose to better their draft pick to hoping they pull off the upset and ruin the Pats' season for good speaks volumes. Pick: New England

Miami at Tennessee

Aaron: What it really boils down to is this: Do I trust Vince Young to help me close the gap between me and Joe? Yes. But, only if Joe picks Tennessee. Pick: Miami

Joe: Oh, fine. Pick: Tennessee

Houston at St. Louis

Aaron: Fortunately for the Texans, this one's on the road. The remains of former Houston QB David Carr - buried under Reliant Stadium, deep in his own territory - can't haunt the team in St. Louis. Pick: Houston

Joe: So which college QB should start prepping to arrange a trade out of St. Louis come April. Pick: Houston

Atlanta at N.Y. Jets

Aaron: Falcons' QB Matt Ryan and RB Michael Turner are listed as "game-time decisions". I admire each man's desire to take the field in their valiant attempt to finish six games behind the Saints. Pick: NY Jets

Joe: The AFC Wild Card team is destined to be 9-7, so the Jets' loss here won't knock them out. Pick: Atlanta

Oakland at Denver

Aaron: NOW will you stop picking the Raiders to beat any team, America? Pick: Denver

Joe: Yes. Pick: Denver

Cincinnati at San Diego

Aaron: Any suggestions on what I should do with all these "Chris Henry/Avatar" jokes? Pick: San Diego

Joe: Oh man, why did you never tell me?? This tragedy just keeps getting worse. Pick: San Diego

Green Bay at Pittsburgh

Aaron: The Packers have reclaimed their "pretty good team" appellation. Maybe when the Vikings beat 'em in the second round of the playoffs - for the third time this season - we'll remember their flaws. Pick: Green Bay

Joe: Meanwhile, Mike Tomlin is about one more Above the Rim Juice joke away from flipping out and cutting the whole team. Pick: Green Bay

Tampa Bay at Seattle

Aaron: I know how I feel after a 3,000-mile flight across three time zones: tired. I assume the 1-12 Bucs will feel the same way. Pick: Seattle

Joe: Poor Josh Freeman. He's like Mark Sanchez but with many, many fewer wins. Pick: Seattle

Minnesota at Carolina

Aaron: Brett Favre...outdoors...December...? I'd feel a lot better about this if the immortal Matt Moore wasn't quarterbacking the Panthers. Pick: Carolina

Joe: You seem incredibly confident and/or foolhardy. I like that. Pick: Minnesota

N.Y. Giants at Washington

Aaron:Even Giants fans know it's over, right? Right? Pick: Washington

Joe: Not as over as it is for Jim Zorn. Pick: NY Giants

Confidence Pickin' (with current scores)

Joe (38): BRONCOS (-14) over Raiders; SEAHAWKS (-6.5) over Bucs; Falcons (+6) over JETS

Aaron (37): SEAHAWKS (-6.5) over Bucs; RAMS (+12.5) over Texans; CHARGERS (-6.5) over Bengals

Tom (29): JETS( -6) over Falcons; Giants( -3) over REDSKINS; Bears (+10.5) over RAVENS


CrazyCanuck said...

Obscure, old-school wrestling reference? Now that's howz I likes my blog predictions. TankU.

And damn you Jaguars, for teasing me so, you jezebels.

SHough610 said...

I love the reference to Backlund. Now if Peyton would just turn into 1994 Backlund I think I would die from joy.

Also, saw this on your twitter feed today: "Supposed to be in the 70s all weekend in SD. I will order a Blizzard from DQ so I can connect in some small way with my east coast friends." I just jogged/trudged through 2.5 miles of snow that varied between three inches and a foot. The point is, I'm considering my next move to the West Coast instead of back to PHila.

That Bootleg Guy said...

'94 Backlund ranks right up there with the East Coast rap renaissance; the little-seen film "Greedy" and '94 Deion Sanders as my favorite things about 1994.

And the warm Xmas weather isn't so much fun during a one-hour outdoors Xmas program at J's school - with me in my work clothes. Sorry, Aaron's co-workers after I got back to the office.

Tom said...

Trivia Answer: David Carr is actually Eli Manning's back-up. He may or may not have gotten a drive or two during the NY/Oakland scrimmage back when we thought the Giants were good.

Also -- I don't know if you still watch House, but they made a passing reference to the Mike Tomlin/Omar Epps phenomenon. Something along the lines of House saying: "All this going on, I feel just like Mike Tomlin. Well... obviously not as much as you."