Sunday, December 6, 2009

2009 NFL Pickery - Week #13 (Thursday)

Last Week:

Aaron: 13-3
Joe: 11-5
Tom: 10-6

Season to Date:

Tom: 118-58
Joe: 117-59
Aaron: 113-63

N.Y. Jets at Buffalo

Aaron: Hey, it's a sure-to-be-sloppy game between two teams on short rest playing in front of an indifferent Thursday night crowd in Toronto. And, who the hell scheduled this one for the same night the NHL's Maple Leafs are on TV at the same time? Pick: NY Jets

Joe: Living in NYC gets me around the NFL Network blackout, but after the miserable experience of watching a terrible Bills team get a worthless win over a Jets team I stupidly picked in my suicide pool, making me actively hate my own football team for the first time ever, I'm not sure how much I'm looking forward to this one. Additionally, I've gone 3-for-3 picking against Cam on these NFL Network Thursday games, which is about to make me do something stupid. Pick: Buffalo

Tampa Bay at Carolina

Aaron: Somewhere up in Heaven, Art Shell, Romeo Crennel and Ray Rhodes are looking down on Bucs head coach Raheem Morris and collectively exclaiming, "Damn, son." Pick: Carolina

Joe: Are the Bucs the fun bad team? The Browns are the bad bad team, the Chiefs are the kinda-dangerous bad team, the Raiders are the bad non-team, the Lions are the bad team with a glimmer of hope, and the Redskins are the bad team that could win ugly. We need a fun bad team. Help us out, Josh Freeman. Pick: Carolina

St. Louis at Chicago

Aaron: Since the start of October, the Bears have beaten just two teams: Detroit and Cleveland. Chicago's sporadic cavalcade of cupcake annihilation continues unabated. Pick: Chicago

Joe: Last chance, Bears offense. Pick: Chicago

Tennessee at Indianapolis

Aaron: Soooo...we're all just gonna give Vince Young the win here despite the fact he hasn't beaten ONE very good-to-great team since that rarely-mentioned, long-forgotten Rose Bowl game? Pick: Indianapolis

Joe: I let Cam take the Colts-loyalist mantle from me last week, to me detriment. Not again. Pick: Indianapolis

Philadelphia at Atlanta

Aaron: Michael Vick returns to Atlanta and America is supposed to care about the crowd's reaction. The same crowd that single-handedly crafted Vick's overrated reputation when he wasn't a felon. Yes, the opinion of that crowd is vital to the national Vick discourse. Pick: Atlanta

Joe: Vick is one Annual Donovan McNabb injury away from being the only name player on the field this week. Pick: Philadelphia

Oakland at Pittsburgh

Aaron: Ben Roethlisberger still isn't 100%, but he's starting for the Steelers here. Just how low can a QBs health be before the Raiders actually have a chance? Could Oakland win if Big Ben was only 50% healthy? 25%? Dead? Pick: Pittsburgh

Joe: Don't give those Raider fans/convicts any ideas. Pick: Pittsburgh

Detroit at Cincinnati

Aaron: If I had to pick one team most likely to lose a first round playoff game at home, it's the Bengals. Hope those "2009 AFC North Champions" t-shirts keep you warm this winter, Cincy. Pick: Cincinnati

Joe: Warmer than the threadbare Top 10 Draft Pick shirts you and I will be sporting. I'd kill for a first-round home playoff loss. Pick: Cincinnati

New Orleans at Washington

Aaron: Good to know that last Monday night's home win over an aging Patriots team that's woefully short on defense and missing its once fearsome mystique PROVES that the Saints are for real. Pick: New Orleans

Joe: ...Wow, really? Pick: New Orleans

New England at Miami

Aaron: Just how many eulogies will be written about the Pats this season? Isn't there some way the media can just consolidate the "Belichick has lost it; Brady's skittish in the pocket; the defense sucks" storylines into one column and be done with it? Pick: New England

Joe: After seven years of expertly choreographed fellatio on the Pats, their players, their coach, and their fan base, I can take an extended remix on their decline. Pick: New England

Houston at Jacksonville

Aaron: The Texans have been slammed all week for gagging away last week's big lead to the Colts. Deserved criticism, considering the Texans long legacy of excellence. A win over mediocre J'ville should fix everything. Pick: Houston

Joe: I'm not about to go back through the archives here or anything, but I bet I haven't gotten more than ten Jacksonville games right over three years. Pick: Houston

Denver at Kansas City

Aaron: One win at home over the Steelers and the Chiefs are "headed in the right direction"? In the last month, KC beat the Raiders by just six and was bludgeoned to death by the Chargers. Just sayin'. Pick: Denver

Joe: But I really WANT to pick a Chiefs upset! Pick: Kansas City

San Diego at Cleveland

Aaron: We're already starting to hear the same tired "no one will want to play the Chargers in the playoffs" refrain. Just gonna ignore the fact that their running game is abysmal and they're still coached by Norv Turner? OK, then. Pick: San Diego

Joe: I'm not even gonna say anything. Cam seems very certain of how this Chargers season will play out, and he has the advantage of irrationally hating them. Pick: San Diego

San Francisco at Seattle

Aaron: The 49ers still haven't lost a game within their division this season. "Small sample size", you say? "Meh", I retort. Pick: San Francisco

Joe: Looks like we're ready for this yo-yo Niners season to experience a yo. The second yo. The yo that means you lose. Pick: Seattle

Dallas at N.Y. Giants

Aaron: I gotta say...this NFC East hair-pulling slap-fight to the playoffs makes for some compelling TV. Thank God ESPN is here to breakdown the mediocrity minute-by-minute. Pick: NY Giants

Joe: Yeah, these teams are pretty much destined to knock each other around until one, maybe two limps into the playoffs. Pick: NY Giants

Minnesota at Arizona

Aaron: Kurt Warner...Matt Leinart...hard to believe Brett Favre might actually be the most likeable QB in the stadium on Sunday, but there ya go. Pick: Minnesota
Joe: Your anti-Christian, anti-handsome stance disgusts me. Pick: Arizona

Baltimore at Green Bay

Aaron: When Aaron Rodgers stops wetting himself in the face of a good defense, I'll pick him against a good defense. Pick: Baltimore

Joe: Aaron Rodgers has earned my enduring loyalty. That's all I'll say. Pick: Green Bay

Confidence Pickin' (with current scores)

Joe (33): Pats (-4) over DOLPHINS; Chargers (-13.5) over BROWNS; CHIEFS (+5) over Broncos

Aaron (30): FALCONS (+5.5) over Eagles; Chargers (-13.5) over BROWNS; Giants (+2.5) over Cowboys

Tom (24): Ravens (+3) over PACKERS; Saints (-9.5) over REDSKINS; Eagles (-5.5) over FALCONS

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