Sunday, May 23, 2010

TBG TV: LOST -- Kinda-Sorta Series Finale Spoilers!


Because the above title sounds 10% sexier than "Some Random Guesses at What'll Happen on Lost Tonight". And, before any of you start rolling your eyes, I'd like y'all to remember that god-awful Mel Gibson/Julia Roberts thriller, Conspiracy Theory. Everyone thought Jerry Fletcher's wild-eyed accusations were no more than crazy-man ranting...until he was FINALLY right (about one thing out of, like, a bazillion).

Juliet = Sideways Jack's Ex-Wife -- Other than Entertainment Weekly's network-sanctioned post-episode write-ups of incessant positivity, I don't follow Lost all that closely on the interwebs. For all I know, this could be common knowledge. But, I first heard m'man
Daniels propose this plot twist after Sideways Jack's son was revealed earlier this season.

Jack is NOT the 'Ch-Ch-Chosen One' -- Last week's "passing of the torch Manischewitz" scene between Jack and Jacob seemed...too convenient. There should be more conflict -- internal AND external -- with a decision that ostensibly orbits the entire point of the show. Jack won't end up as protector of the island, but the writers will frame it in such a way that makes him look better than whoever ends up as island champion. (I believe it's been 20 years, since Hollywood
set the standard for this specific angle.)

Sideways Locke = New Jacob -- For you lemmings who don't believe this'll make a lick of sense, try to imagine it happening tonight on Lost and not as ill-informed conjecture from a lightly-read blogger looking to fill space on a Sunday morning. Hurley's my dark horse choice here. His "glad it wasn't me" line after losing out on last week's "new Jacob lottery" seemed like an obvious swerve set-up.

Ben = New Smokey -- This one's a stretch, I'll admit, but the "light v. dark" dynamic is the one constant surrounding the very existence of the island and someone's got to ascend (descend?) to the evil throne. I hesitate to commit fully to this idea, because Island Ben appears to be...up to something. I'm not sure his current motives are entirely evil...well, once you look past the whole "killing Widmore" thing. Ben seemed to intentionally wait to shoot Widmore until he (Widmore) told Dark Locke about Desmond -- thereby saving his daughter, Penny, in the process.

The Final Scene -- I read that the writers had mapped out the series' final scene not long after negotiating the end date with ABC. Would I put it past them to lift the opening sequence from the season five finale? The one that showed Jacob and The Man in Black having a pleasant conversation on the beach while politely establishing their immortal "Road Runner v. Wile E. Coyote" relationship? Just put Locke and Ben in those roles and quick-cut to black. There ya go.

4 comments:

Tom said...

My friend Hulse agrees with your last scene scenario, but he thinks it will be Locke and Jack instead of Locke and Ben.

The worst "last scene" theory that I read was that the whole thing was some psychological experiment by Dharma -- which terrifies me because they've been insistent that they'll explain the food drop from the first season and, as yet, haven't.

Jeff Hansen said...

"The one that showed Jacob and The Man in Black having a pleasant conversation on the beach while politely establishing their immortal "Road Runner v. Wile E. Coyote" relationship? Just put Locke and Ben in those roles and quick-cut to black. There ya go."

Oh, so close! I believe the metaphor you are looking for is this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZYYiNi948V4

SHough610 said...

I like the ending scene idea. I actually heard JJ Abrams came up with the Walt-Locke backgammon idea with avatars for light and dark (who would evolve into Jacob and Flocke).

The Juliet-is-Jack's-ex is a bit of an easy slam dunk, no? I like the rest of your theories.

SHough610 said...

Didn't want to comment jack your burger review butwanted to get a quick comment in on the LOST finale (you said you were posting something, but I didn't want to forget things). I'm going to keep it non-spoilery as I can.

1) That ending took balls. When I first saw it I described it as, "Vague, Matrix-level vague". But upon rewatching it was the perfect send-off. However, I don't doubt that a large amount of people watching simply didn't get it. In fact, I know that for a fact because I saw facebook statuses of friends.

2) Darlton made a statement with the ending: the characters were more important than the mythology. I appreciated that.

3) I don't really know what people wanted out of the finale that they didn't get? Like a lot of answers? I feel like, with a few exceptions, every question I had was answered (why was Walt important? Was Widmore good or bad? Who was trapped in the cabin by the ash circle?) and all the important ones were answered.