Sunday, February 11, 2007

Hammer featuring Deion Sanders - TBG Looks Back



I remember this video.

I remember it on The Box. I remember it on BET. I remember it on MTV.

1994 was a difficult time for America as Shaquille O'Neal's guest verse with Fu-Schnickens on Can We Rock (What's Up Doc) gave every pro athlete FM aspirations. And, Deion Sanders was, believe it or not, the most logical choice to be next on the mic.

Seriously.

Credibility, of course, wasn't a requirement.

The above video is Straight to My Feet from the soundtrack to the movie Street Fighter. I can't begin to capture everything you should look for, but as y'all embark on this four minute and thirty-three second assault on your eyes and ears, try'n find the following:

1.) The Sumo wrestlers in the opening sequence who, to the untrained eye, look like those bovine broads that Nelly put in his early videos.

2.) The 2nd runners-up in the 1994 Jodeci look-a-like contest who appear to be singing the hook.

3.) Hammer's precious lil' "shimmy" in the man-made tunnel, just before he takes the stage.

4.) Deion's bandana-tied-in-a-bow accessory that everyone knows only Tupac was able to pull off and even on him, it looked like a tourniquet on a turd.

5.) The Jean-Claude Van Damme cameo. He chair-dances(!), mouths the hook and then dances(!!) some more. This one really deserves its own post. Can someone see if MGF's Mathan Erhardt could write something on the worst ever celebrity cameos in a video? This one's easily in the top three.

6.) Deion switches into a pair of leather pants and matching leather vest about half-way through. After Eddie Murphy in Raw and Delirious, I thought the Black man had moved past that.

7.) "Drop! Now, Lean!" (Trust me, you'll know when you see it.)

8.) The video quality isn't that great, but that sure looks like the guy who played "Juwanna Mann" in the sh*tty movie of the same sh*tty name. Check at about 2:10 into this.

9.) Jean-Claude dances some more. Someone, anyone, really should've stepped in at this point.

10.) "Prime to the Hammer, Hammer to the Prime!"

2 comments:

ron mexico said...

aaron-

much love for finding the video as I had gone my entire life without seeing it. Would you believe that it's not Jean Claude's worst attempt at dancing caught on film? That would be the scene in Bloodsport where he gets drunk and starts dancing..complete with the split.

c.j.s. said...

I have no words for this. As one of the four guys who actually saw the Street Fighter movie, I now feel even dirtier.